Overwhelmed and Over It: Reclaiming Life with ADHD Compassion

Author: Earlyn Sharpe, M.A.

We live in a culture that glorifies hustle and punishes pause. For those living with ADHD, the overwhelm can feel relentless—tasks pile up, focus scatters, and shame creeps in. But the truth is, overwhelm is not a personal failure; it’s a signal from your body and mind asking for compassion.

Compassion looks like slowing down instead of pushing harder. It seems like saying, ‘I am not broken; I am learning how to work with my beautiful, complex brain.’ You are allowed to reclaim your life—not in spite of ADHD, but with it.

Have you ever felt like your brain is on the fritz? Like all the tabs are open in your mind, and you can’t even find the one playing music?

Welcome to the life of an adult with ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder), in a world that demands productivity, multitasking, and excellence.

In April, we’re refreshed by new energy—spring cleaning, routines, and the urge to exhale after a long winter. But April can also put the spotlight on overwhelm, undone lists, and shame when we don’t (or can’t) keep up. It’s when compassion comes in—compassion, but not the kind you already have for everyone else, but the kind you haven’t yet learned to give yourself.

ADHD Is Not Laziness, It’s a Different Operating System

Adults with ADHD get it from all sides—we’re lazy, unmotivated, and irresponsible. If you grow up with an ADHD brain, you know this: it’s not your fault, it’s just how your brain processes information, attention, and energy. It’s like your brain is working with a different operating system. Some things will be more complicated (forgetting, distraction, impulsivity), and some things will come naturally (creativity, innovation, hyperfocus on what matters).

Overwhelm Is Not a Sentence, It’s a Signal

The message of overwhelm is that your body and brain are signalling a need for change. Whether it’s the stuff around you, the work you’re taking on, or the expectations you’re internalizing. When you’re overwhelmed, you probably feel like you’re failing. But instead of giving up, consider this: can overwhelm be a signal to start listening? To yourself, to your body, to the world around you. Can you accept it’s not a sentence (you suck and you always will) but an invitation to re-center and re-align?

Self-Compassion Is a Survival Skill

The harshest critic is the voice inside our heads. Self-compassion is not about being easy on ourselves. It’s about learning that growth doesn’t come from shame. Research shows self-compassion is linked to better resilience, motivation, and emotional regulation. Self-compassion can be the difference between perpetual burnout and a sustainable energy level for adults with ADHD.

Try this: the next time you find yourself thinking, “I should have done more,” pause, and say, “I did the best I could with the energy I had today, and that’s enough.” Notice how your whole nervous system relaxes when you give yourself the grace you deserve.

Practical Steps to Rewire Your Brain with ADHD Compassion

Breaking up with overwhelm begins with a few simple changes:

• Break a task down into micro steps, starting with only the first one.

• Work with visual cues (planners, sticky notes, phone reminders) instead of memory.

• Build in recovery time after tasks. Your brain needs downtime transitions.

• Acknowledge and celebrate progress, not perfection. Small wins create momentum.

Overwhelm does not have to rule your life. When you give yourself the gift of compassion for your ADHD, your energy, your pace—you start to create space for joy, clarity, and balance. You stop resisting yourself and start walking beside yourself. When you walk beside yourself, life is a little lighter.

The truth is: you were never made to do it all at once. You were made to do it with grace, one step at a time, one step at a time aligned with your whole self.

Reflection: What’s one small act of compassion you can give yourself today when overwhelm rises?

Want to Dive Deeper?

If this article resonated with you, I’ll dive into this topic more from a personal place on my Sip & Heal: Tea and Therapy Talks podcast.

Listen to the episode here: http://bit.ly/45vdH23 or on your favourite podcast carrier.